Taylor Swift, purveyor of rainbows with a voice like a harp, has been walking among us mere mortals since 2006 ever since she released her debut studio album. Since then, it’s become evident to myself and rest of the Internet that Swift isn’t just a pop country singer. She is a princess.
Hear me out:
1. She’s dating American royalty
Swift has been linked to various douches (from John Mayer to Joe Jonas) but that was clearly a front to throw us off. Now she’s rumoured to be dating a Kennedy, which basically means she’s with the bees knees of American royalty. She and Robert F. Kennedy’s grandson Conor Kennedy have been cozying up together in Hyannis Port, Mass, going sailing and eating at a local pizzeria. If that’s not enough, I’m pretty sure you can see the faint hint of glitter burst from the soles of Taylor’s feet in the photos of her and Prince Charming.
2. She can talk to animals
Taylor enlightened us a few months ago when she revealed her unique skill of jabbering with fairytale creatures, namely her fluffy feline Meredith. She proceeded to share Instagram photos of her cray adventures with said cat over Twitter. Proof that only princesses can talk to animals, remember the Disney princesses of yore:
3. Her lyrics are contradictory Read more…
Tina Fey is an accomplished actress, writer and comedienne but the 42-year-old was missing something in her life. Rap. Let’s say her new life course was the direct consequence of a confusing mid-life crisis, except it really wasn’t, but it just makes the story more interesting.
Fey was recruited by comedian/rapper Childish Gambino to spew out the closing lyrics on his song “Real Estate.” The duo are also joined by Atlanta rappers Alley Boy and Swank.
Fey’s intense rap style is semi-threatening, as though she’s beckoning you to mess with her. She’s also very honest with her lyrics: “This is the part where most people would say something crazy and drop the n-word after it/ Not going to, not gonna do that/ I don’t feel comfortable/ I’m out!”
The song is from the Royalty mixtape offered as a free download by Childish Gambino.
Listen to it here: