Laid back, So-Cal cool retailer American Eagle has “graciously” taken the next steps in making skinny jeans even skinner with their Spray On Skinny jeans.
Apparently, this is an actual product that they’re selling online. For $49.95 you can get two spray cans, one in the light “wash” and the other in indigo. While they are available for men and women, all 1,000 of the limited edition run are “sold out.”
It’s like AE execs were reading a little too much into Sports Illustrated’s swimsuit issue (or lack thereof) and though that no, jeggings weren’t enough to burn the retinas of our eyes. They even made a commercial just to show us how disturbing this product really is (watch it below).
“I like skinny jeans,” says one actor. “But sometimes they’re not skinny enough.” Wait, what? Losing feelings in your legs is not skinny enough? Being unable to bend down is not skinny enough? What is wrong with you?
We have a couple of questions for those “people” who bought the stuff:
1. How do you cover your junk?
2. How do you draw on the pockets?
3. What is an appropriate venue to be sporting the “jeans”?
Oh, I hope this is just a really bad April Fool’s joke because I’m really not up for the task of trying to awkwardly sidestep anyone “wearing” a pair of skinny skinny jeans. Bumping into them would get awkward really, really fast.
WATCH THE COMMERCIAL BELOW:
In an interview with Allure magazine, Jessica Simpson openly discusses her perceived weight gain, the state of her past relationships and her plan to (finally) keep her clothes on.
After a photo was released last year of Simpson looking portly in a pair of high-waisted jeans, whispers of a relationship-induced weight gain fluttered across the Internet.
“When I walk through an airport and people go, ‘You’re not fat!’ I’m like, ‘Thanks. That’s great. Good to know I’m not fat today! Thank you!”
Do you think she’ll be grounded? Tyra Banks is in big trouble with the Parents Television Council.
The controversy comes after an episode of Banks’ reality contest show, “America’s Next Top Model.” During the episode, one contestant’s assignment was to recreate Marilyn Monroe’s naked photoshoot in a bed. All private parts were blurred or obscured for the show.
But that’s not enough for the Council. Its president, Tim Winter, told TV Guide the photoshoot “crossed the legal threshold for broadcast indecency.”
“This is not simply a matter of artistic freedom, as some might claim. Rather, this is about a television network intentionally pushing the envelope to establish a new acceptable nudity standard for the broadcast medium.”
Winter also believes that the length of the photoshoot scene – more than a minute – proves that it was “wholly gratuitous and undoubtedly intended to titillate,” he said.