The worst April Fools jokes are the ones that hit us where it hurts when the ones we love (yes Netflix, I’m talking to you) dangle the things we desire the most in front of our eyes. Basically, these jokes are real life Mirrors of Erisad (high fiving all the Potterheads right now!). But if someone were to make the following into reality, I want in and just take my money already. I’m not kidding.
1. Hulu pretending to stream popular shows-within-television-shows
A) Why would you tease us like that? B) the biggest joke of all is that HULU isn’t available in Canada.
2. Scope’s Bacon Mouthwash
This is too good and had to be mentioned twice.
3. Google Nose
The answer to all your stupid Yahoo! questions.
4. Netflix
Secretsupernatural on Tumblr is on to something. She just had to wonder what happens when you googled Nicholas Cage and Tumblr. For a reference, here’s what you get when you simple Google Nicolas Cage:
And here’s what she got when she googled Nicolas Cage + Tumblr:
Best thing ever, right?
Well, as the inquiring journalists that we are, we just had to see what comes up when you google Nicolas Cage and any other website. Here’s what we found.
1. Nicolas Cage and Facebook
2. Nicolas Cage and Instagram
Things escalate quickly when your song becomes an internet meme. From goats yelling to Nicolas Cage screams, Taylor Swift’s “I Knew You Were Trouble” is back with a very distressing edition.
Featuring screams from goats, humans, Dragon Ball Z and rabbits, I don’t know whether to laugh or scream because all of this yelling is making me a little bit stressed.
WELP. Taylor, why do you have to sing about your troubles all the time????!!!!
Trolling, you’re doing it right. Playing a joke on High School Quiz Show host Billy Costa, the team from Brookline High School decides to proclaim their love for actor Nicolas Cage by naming their favourite movies of his.
While I know Cage has an Oscar under his belt for Leaving Las Vegas, many of his roles such as Kick Ass, National Treasure and Season of the Witch have been highly questionable. With his over-exaggerations and creepy stares, it’s the subtle trolling by these students that make this video so hysterical.
I can only think of a handful of American actors (Elijah Wood, Gwyneth Paltrow and Renée Zellweger, to name a few) who can do successfully do an English accent. But as far as the majority goes, the results are often quite disastrous.
I’ve never understood why directors don’t choose to hire British actors to play BRITISH CHARACTERS. Maybe they think the name of the actor will help boost sales. But honestly, I just think that’s just too big a risk to take.
(And as for Nicolas Cage’s accent, I’m just going to go out and say that he was acting like himself.)
In retrospect, Nicolas Cage has some pretty fine movie quotes. Some of my personal faves include:
“What’s wrong can never be made right.”
- Ronny Cammareri, Moonstruck
“I’ll be taking these Huggies and whatever cash you got.”
- H.I McDonough, Raising Arizona
“I came here to drink myself to death.”
- Ben Sanderson, Leaving Las Vegas
“Put… the bunny… back… in the box.”
- Cameron Poe, Con Air
His old movies are way better than his new ones. They were quirkier and much less commercial than doozies like Season of the Witch and National Treasure. But this nine minute compilation of his best movies lines is worth it just to remember some of his older lines.
When an actor loses his shit on-screen or out in the streets, it is now referred to as “Cage Rage”. Yes, we made a verb out of it.
One genius by the name of Harry Hanrahan decided he’d spend his day putting together a montage of every single film Nicolas Cage is in that involves screaming, swearing or both.
Nicolas can’t even sing the alphabet without raising his voice/fists, as he demonstrates so beautifully in “A Vampire’s Kiss”. There’s also that romantic moment in “The Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call” where he points a gun at two innocent old ladies. What a classy guy!
The cream of the crop is found in “The Wicker Man”, where Nicolas Cage dresses up in a bear costume only to punch a grown woman in the face.
Nicolas isn’t in the dark about this awesome YouTube video, though. In an interview with Screenjunkies.com, he called Harry’s piece “very exciting”.
Weston Cage, the 20-year-old son of actor Nicolas Cage, has been hospitalized after an altercation, reports E Online.
Cage was taken to a Los Angeles hospital for psychiatric evaluation after reportedly getting into a violent altercation in Hollywood yesterday.
TMZ claims that Cage went ballistic while lunching with his trainer after he told him he couldn’t eat something on the menu. He then became aggressive and reportedly shoved the trainer. Ugh, it’s tough lunching with your trainer, right? Don’t you hate that?
The trainer and another unidentified individual then tried to calm Cage down, but Weston raged on.
An LAPD spokeswoman says officers indeed responded to a call about a fight that had broken out near the Farmer’s Kitchen, where Weston was dining.
“We had numerous phone calls to respond to that incident. We responded and the person was taken to the hospital for minor injuries,” said the spokeswoman, refusing to confirm identities.
When cops arrived, Weston initially cooperated and was handcuffed, but he supposedly became violent again which lead them to strap him to a gurney. No arrests were made, but Cage is being evaluated.
This is the ridiculous too-much-money story of the day. I mean, really? Don’t you wish your biggest battles were over what your trainer tells you to eat?
After he has reported financial ruin, another group has got in line to sue Nicolas Cage. According to PEOPLE.com, this time it’s a real estate company that claims Cage owes $5 million in unpaid loans. Attorneys for Red Curb Investments allege that Cage, his accountant, and a mortgage broker defrauded the Company by not properly disclosing Cage’s true financial picture, including $6.3 million owed to the IRS.
Actor Nicolas Cage was presented with the Global Citizen of the Year award by United Nations Secretary General Ban Ki-moon Friday in New York City, reports CBC. He also received the title of UN goodwill ambassador on drugs and crime.
“My real life role as goodwill ambassador will certainly be even more challenging and meaningful than those I have portrayed on screen,” Cage, 45, said.
“Nicolas Cage’s characters have exposed us to some of the darkest aspects of human nature,” said Antonia Maria Costa, executive director of the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime. “Now he is championing one of the most noble – the quest for justice.”
Nicolas Cage has made a LOT of movies, so realistically, he should have enough money in the bank to afford the entire city of New Orleans. But according to People.com, Cage owes $6.3 million in back taxes and now he is blaming it on his business manager.
Samuel J. Levin is now facing a lawsuit from Cage himself, but has not released any statements.
The lawsuit stated Levin “lined his [own] pockets with several million dollars in business management fees while sending Cage down a path toward financial ruin.” Cage is now apparently forced to sell major assets in order to cover the tax liabilities, according to the lawsuit.
His two houses in the French Quarter of New Orleans were auctioned for a collective $4.5 million on Friday, about one-third of their appraised value.
If you can sit through corny lines such as “everyone has their destiny,” “Astro Boy” isn’t too shabby. While it doesn’t live up to Pixar standards, the movie is quite an engaging family-friendly action flick.
The animated film tells the story of a robotic boy who first emerged in the 1950’s as part of a Japanese manga series. Astro Boy then ventured into television in the ‘60s and today, he can be seen on the silver screen with upgraded CGI animation.
The film starts with Toby (voiced by Freddie Highmore), a brilliant, curious kid who’s the son of an even more brilliant scientist (Nicolas Cage). Unfortunately, he dies in a freak lab accident and his father, stricken with grief and guilt, creates a robot that looks exactly like Toby (memories included).
However, he realizes shortly after bringing the robot home that no one — or in this case nothing — can replace his son. He abandons the robot, who later takes on the name Astro and leaves the gleaming Metro City in order to find a place where he belongs (I apologize for the cheesiness, but that’s literally how he feels).
There’s one catch, Astro is powered by Blue Core energy, a crystalline nugget that’s extremely powerful and that the government, mainly the vicious president, wants to get its hands on.
What started as a close and unpredictable race to box office supremacy wound up an easy win for Nicolas Cage’s latest sci-fi flick, Knowing, reports ew.com. The film, which grossed $24.8 mil this weekend, trumped challenges from the comedic I Love You, Man and the Julia Roberts-Clive Owen thriller Duplicity.
After a crazed intruder broke into his family home in Newport Beach this past October, actor Nicolas Cage didn’t need to think twice before pressing charges.
Cage stumbled upon 46 year old Robert Dennis Furo Jr. one night, as Furo crept through Cage’s kitchen, wearing nothing but Nic’s leather jacket.
The intruder pled guilty to one count of felony stalking in court this week. His attorney argued that Furo had been in a “drug induced daze” at the time of the crime, but that didn’t stop the Orange County courts from sentencing Furo to time served in the Orange County jail, as well as 6 months of mandatory drug rehab.
In addition, Furo has been ordered to abstain from making any form of contact with Cage or his family, and must remain a minimum of 100 yards away at any given time.
Charges of theft with a prior conviction were dismissed.
The Los Angeles home of actor Nicolas Cage has hit the market with a steep pricetag of $35 million U.S.
The asking price is five times higher than what Cage paid for the mansion in 1998, reports the Los Angeles Times.
Located in the posh Bel-Air neighbourhood, the 11,000-square-foot house boasts seven bedrooms, a games room, a custom wine cellar, a theatre and an Olympic-sized pool. The house was built in 1940, with only a brick wall standing between it and Sunset Boulevard.
Previous owners include singers Tom Jones and Dean Martin.
Actor Nicolas Cage is donating $2 million US to charitable organization Amnesty International to help former child soldiers.
The donation will help support rehabilitation shelters, medical services, and psychological and reintegration programs, reports the BBC.
According to Amnesty, some 300,000 children worldwide — as young as 7 years old — are involved in armed conflicts.
“Think about the nine months it took for your child to be born; think about all the care you put into teaching him how to cross the street and look both ways, or to read a book, or to simply have good manners,” said Cage in a video statement. “Then imagine a warlord dropping a gun into his hand and forcing him to kill someone.”
The actor has been working with Amnesty International USA for two years.
The organization collaborated on the 2005 film “Lord of War,” in which Cage plays an international arms dealer. The film also deals with the terrifying reality of children involved in warfare.
Kal-el, which is Superman’s Krypton name, may come in handy when the real life baby boy is trying to fend off tabloid photographers.
Oscar-winning actor Nicolas Cage’s third wife (whom he married in July 2004), Alice Kim, has given birth to the couple’s first child on Monday. The couple named the baby Kal-el.
The name may have derived from the fact that Cage was once linked with playing Superman onscreen.
Annett Wolf, publicist for Cage, said: “They are healthy and happy and it’s quite lovely.”
This is not Cage?s first child; he has another son with actress Kristina Fulton.
So What?
Alice Kim received a pretty large tip when Cage asked her for her hand in marriage.
If I were a former waitress I?d be poppin? out a baby to keep child support coming too (just in case). I mean, Cage doesn?t exactly have a great track record with wives (considering Kim was number three). Hey I guess third time could be the charm or it could be strike three. Either way, now Kim has is made– just a regular working girl moving on up!
Nicolas Cage is set to star as a police officer in the one of the first Hollywood films about the 9/11 terrorist attacks, according to Paramount Pictures.
Oliver Stone will direct the untitled movie, which will tell the tale of Sgt. John McLoughlin and William Jimeno, the last two men to be pulled out of the rubble of the World Trade Center.
The two Port Authority officers sold their life rights to Paramount, providing the basis for the original screenplay by Andrea Berloff.
Cage, who once won an Academy Award for his role in Leaving Las Vegas, will play McLoughlin. No other casting decisions have been made at this time.
Paramount apparently gave producers the green light to begin work on the film in the hopes of getting a leg up on another 9/11 film in development at rival Columbia Pictures.
A new comedy in the works will star Nicolas Cage and Will Smith, according to reports. And it won’t take much to be a better film that Cage’s “National Treasure.”
The film will be called “Time Share,” and will see Cage and Smith playing two fathers booked into the same time share vacation.
They will also both be producers.
This will be the first time the duo work together.
The ridiculousness of National Treasure is summed up by one Nicolas Cage line: “The dollar bill is trying to tell me something.”
I’m prepared to suspend my beliefs while watching any movie, including this one, but there’s a certain point that makes me shake my head. The absurdity of this film takes away from everything that’s good?and there are many good things about this movie.
It’s an adventure from start to finish, and sure you can guess how it will end after watching the trailer, but it’s still entertaining.
Nicolas Cage stars as Ben Gates, who follows clues, leading him to an invisible treasure map on the back of the United States Declaration of Independence. Seriously.
It would be a stretch to say Cage is at his best in National Treasure, though he isn’t bad. He always seems nervous but has the confidence to continue the trek and almost make it believable (almost). The character is cursed however since he is forced into a love plot with Abigail Chase, played by Diane Kruger, though they barely have any convincing scenes together and have no screen time to show the audience that this relationship is properly built up.
The bonus features give this DVD some credibility. Included is an hour’s worth of material, such as deleted scenes, an alternate ending, featurettes, and an interactive puzzle.
2.5*
