Movie Review: Twilight New Moon

Twilight New MoonI am not the audience for this movie.

I did not see the original Twilight. I read the novel and was horrified; how many teenage girls truly believe that men like Edward Cullen exist? (Fewer, probably, than the number of boys men who expect to meet a gorgeous independent woman who caters to their every whim and is miraculously attracted to slovenly underachievers, but that’s a rant for another film.) In real life a man who stalks protects a woman the way Edward does will continue to do so whether her life’s in danger or not. Perhaps the majority of Twilight fans recognize this, and treat the stories as wish fulfillment, much as this reviewer does with good romantic comedies (though not, it must be said, The Ugly Truth, which peddled a similar adolescent fantasy).

On that level, New Moon delivers. It reproduces the central appeal of the books: a man who’s faster, stronger, more romantic, better at playing baseball and musical instruments alike and more beautiful than anyone you could possibly imagine falls for Bella Swan, an ordinary, unremarkable-looking girl, and continually professes not only that he loves her, but that he cannot live without her. So protective is he that when his otherworldly urges place her in danger he actually abandons her to protect her.

This is the basest sort of adolescent fantasy, the kind any writer who’s attended university could dream up, and yet it would be undone by a sense of manufactured cynicism if author Stephenie Meyer didn’t wholeheartedly believe in it. She does, and it would appear a wide cross-section of the western world does too.

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Emily Osment Hates VHS and Vinyl

Emily OsmentFor those of you under 20 years of age, there used to be these crazy things called VHS and Vinyl. VHS were these tapes that played movies and all sorts of video, in machines hooked up to your TV. Vinyl were these big discs which contained music that you played on something called a record machine. Sadly as Emily told Jordan, her newest projects, Hannah Montana The Movie will not be available on VHS and her newest album will not be available on Vinyl. Ah well.


Movie Review: Astro Boy

Astro BoyIf you can sit through corny lines such as “everyone has their destiny,” “Astro Boy” isn’t too shabby. While it doesn’t live up to Pixar standards, the movie is quite an engaging family-friendly action flick.

The animated film tells the story of a robotic boy who first emerged in the 1950’s as part of a Japanese manga series. Astro Boy then ventured into television in the ‘60s and today, he can be seen on the silver screen with upgraded CGI animation.

The film starts with Toby (voiced by Freddie Highmore), a brilliant, curious kid who’s the son of an even more brilliant scientist (Nicolas Cage). Unfortunately, he dies in a freak lab accident and his father, stricken with grief and guilt, creates a robot that looks exactly like Toby (memories included).

However, he realizes shortly after bringing the robot home that no one — or in this case nothing — can replace his son. He abandons the robot, who later takes on the name Astro and leaves the gleaming Metro City in order to find a place where he belongs (I apologize for the cheesiness, but that’s literally how he feels).

There’s one catch, Astro is powered by Blue Core energy, a crystalline nugget that’s extremely powerful and that the government, mainly the vicious president, wants to get its hands on.

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Unreleased Michael Jackson Song To Be Unveiled On October 12

Michael JacksonMichael Jackson fans rejoice.

No, the King of Pop has not been resurrected, but his presence can be felt on October 12 at midnight through his latest never-released single, entitled “This Is It.”

The single will be unveiled to the world on www.MichaelJackson.com. According to Sony, the press release states that “This Is It” marks “yet another exciting moment in music history for one of the world’s most revered artists; featuring backing vocals by Michael’s brothers The Jacksons, the song plays during the closing sequence of Sony Pictures’ forthcoming film MICHAEL JACKSON’S THIS IS IT and is on the 2-disc CD set Michael Jackson’s This Is It, which is the stand-alone companion to the motion picture.”

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Lauren Conrad Tackles The Movie Industry

Lauren ConradLauren Conrad’s spotlight may be gone from reality show, The Hills, but she has deftly redirected it to her newest movie-making endeavor.

Conrad has decided to work with the executive producers of Twilight, Marty Bowen and Wyck Godfrey, to turn her novel, “L.A. Candy,” into a film.

“I mean, you can’t do much better, right?” she remarked to MTV News at the launch of her Kohl’s LC Lauren Conrad clothing line.

According to mtvnews.com, she went on to explain that the book was never meant to be a movie. Instead, Conrad had envisioned it as a TV show. The former Hills star knows a thing or two about TV. “Originally, when people started talking to me about turning the books into television, I was really excited,” she explained. “Then we got approached about the movie and I wasn’t really sure it would work. The story is supposed to take place over a couple of years and it’s hard to do with a movie.”

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Movie Review: Zombieland

zombielandHere’s an old-fashioned crowd-pleaser; albeit, a crowd-pleaser with lots of blood spewing, limb-chewing, and bone breaking – but really, why would you see a movie called Zombieland if you didn’t want to see that?

Here’s a horror film that acknowledges how ridiculous it is by depicting a group of eight-year-old zombie girls before the opening credits; and a comedy that, by casting Jesse Eisenberg in the lead role, quickly establishes an enjoyably quirky tone, and maintains it by adding Abigail Breslin as a shotgun-toting 12-year-old and Woody Harrelson (in a terrific performance) as the movie’s resident badass.

Here’s a genre movie with a coherent plot – Breslin and Emma Stone, playing nervy sisters, push the thin but logical story along – and which pays attention to its characters, giving each of them solid backstories and respectable screentime. (My biggest complaint with Zombieland is that while the sisters are much stronger than typical damsels in distress, they nonetheless wind up being damsels in distress).

Here’s an action movie with an extended, glorious climax at an amusement park, with all the standbys (roller coaster, tilt-a-whirl, drop mechanism) used in exactly the way you’d expect; plus characters using really big guns, and firing them with a generous helping of one-liners.

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J-Roc and The Trailer Park Boys Creator Talk To andPOP

J-RocSo we went to the red carpet for the premiere of the new film (now in theatres) but we also had a one on one sit down with The Trailer Park Boys creator Mike Clattenburg, and the hardest rapper from the East Coast, J-Roc.


John Lennon Biopic Packed With More Stars Than Just a Beatle

NowhereboyFor a generation of people who missed out on the 1960s and the advent of rock’n'roll, we sure are getting to be well-versed. Yet another biopic is slated for release this October, this time in the name of John Lennon.

Nowhere Boy is based on the book Imagine This: Growing Up with my Brother John Lennon by Lennon’s half sister Julia Baird, according to Pitchfork. The screenplay was written by Matt Greenhalgh, author of the Joy Division film Control. The film will focus more on Baird’s experience growing up with the rising star, perhaps offering a unique insight into what transformed Lennon into one of the most idyllic artists of our time.

On board to direct in his feature film debut is Sam Taylor Wood, whose repertoire includes the BAFTA-nominated punk short Love You More.

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Official Poster for Michael Jackson’s This Is It

This Is ItThe poster for Michael Jackson’s This Is It has officially been released by Sony Pictures, who are producing the film. This Is It hits theatres on October 28th and features the legendary singer preparing for his last performance which would have taken place beginning this summer starting at London’s O2 Arena. The Estate of Michael Jackson is in full support of the release of the film.


Inglourious Basterds Trailer

The movie comes out tomorrow so check back for our review later tonight. In the meantime here’s the trailer for the film starring Brad Pitt, Eli Roth, and directed by Quentin Tarantino.


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