I’ve come to realize that movie logic is pretty much a more grown up version of cartoon logic. In a movie or cartoon, just about anything could happen. While cartoons typically gloss over inconsistencies, movies sometimes offer a quick line or two to explain these gaping plot holes. Sometimes, they don’t. While it’s pretty much universally understood that what happens in the movies doesn’t actually happen in real life, we can’t help but nitpick.
Enter CinemaSins who continue to point out film flaws that have been bugging many a viewer since a film’s release. This time around, they point out everything wrong with The Dark Knight. Does this lessen my enjoyment of the movie? No, but I’m glad there’s other people in the world who noticed all this inconsistencies.
Can they do the Dark Knight Rises next and just rip apart Bruce Wayne’s prompt return to Gotham City? Because really, that was messed up.
Will is back in Lima and all the original glee members have returned for the wedding, which results in some surprising Valentine’s Day pairings.
Here’s what you missed on last night’s episode, “I Do”:
Runaway Bride – Emma had been in OCD overdrive in the weeks leading up to the wedding. While everyone, including Will, chalked it up to the demands of being a bride, the stress of possibly having another failed wedding was just too much (I’m sure Sue showing up in a replica of her dress didn’t help either) and she ended up running for the hills. Not a great way for Mr. Schuester to celebrate his return.
Valentine’s Week – As if a day wasn’t enough. Jake was dry when it came to ideas for a gift for Marley, so he enlisted the help of Ryder to make the entire week special. The only problem was that Ryder still has feelings for Marley, so Jake got all the glory while he got all the heartbreak. Marley is a smart girl and figured out that the ideas were coming from him, and when she said thank you, she gave a kiss in return. Poor Ryder! I know Marley’s taken, but I’m not! Come cry on MY shoulder!
Tina is officially a hag – Read more…
Foxes are supposed to be scary, intimidating animals…aren’t they? This fox has a great disposition and an even greater funny face. Once again, a cute, furry animal bonding with their human counterpart. Nothing is cuter or makes you “aww” more. This makes me question if a fox can be domesticated…can I get one as a pet? Is that an option? It should be.
While Rachel and Kurt speed things up in New York, the glee club slows it down for McKinley’s first ever Sadie Hawkins dance.
Ladies choice – It’s finally the girls’ turn to choose, and what better way to do it than through song and dance? Thanks to the brilliance of Tina, the kids treated us to a few adorable (if slightly awkward) reverse proposals, and Coach Beast helped a few teens from the “Too Young to be Bitter” club find the courage to go after what they truly want.
New York minute – Rachel ran full speed ahead into her relationship with Brody. Meanwhile, Kurt was searching for friends and found himself a new crush, Adam, the head of a show choir group on campus. I love that Kurt is finally happy and getting over Blaine, but Rachel is moving a little too fast for my liking. She and Brody just had their first sleepover – scandal alert! – and she’s already asked him to move in. Yikes.
Unrequited love – Read more…
By Jessica Galang
Emblem 3, Fifth Harmony, Tate Stevens and Carly Rose Sonenclar are the final four left standing in the competition, and it’s getting super intense. You can tell all the musicians have their game face on and are bringing it with everything they have. Like last week, the acts will sing two songs: One chosen by the singers themselves, and one chosen by their mentor. Every performance is getting better and showing the true potential of the artists, which is why it’s getting hard to pick just three favourites.
Emblem 3 – “Baby I Love Your Way” (Picked by Emblem 3)
Emblem 3 picked this song because they said it’s their mother and father’s favourite song (Aww!). I’m a sucker for oldies, and I felt like their cover was really modern and creative; I wasn’t a big fan of the rapping part, but I still liked that they put their own personal spin on a classic. Like LA said, they’re super charismatic and they’re good at getting the audience into every performance. Demi said it was the first time she felt they actually lived up to what she expected of them. Twitter user @sassquatchet tweeted “I actually really think Emblem 3 deserves to be in the finals — they have such a unique, raw sound that’s so different than everything today”
Tate Stevens – “Fall” by Clay Walker (Picked by LA)
LA picked an emotional song for Tate, and he performed it so well I felt like he was singing on his wedding day. I don’t even know what to say about Tate anymore – I think everyone understands that his voice is impeccable and unwavering in every performance, and even if he doesn’t win first place, this show won’t be the last we’ll see of him. Demi said: “Your wife must feel like the luckiest girl in the world, spending your fifteenth anniversary singing your heart out to her.” Simon said he was happy that Tate decided to enter the competition.
Carly Rose Sonenclar – “Imagine” by John Lennon (Picked by Britney) Read more…
By Kelly O’Brien
Things are not only rocky for Finn and Rachel, but for Kurt and Blaine, Santana and Brittany, Mr. Schuester and Emma and, and… okay that’s it.
Here’s what you need to know from last night’s episode, “Break Up.”
New York is not for Finn — Finn is back and Rachel is ready to do whatever it takes to keep him in New York. But after a night at Callbacks (a bar where college parties are more karaoke than kegs) and a taste of Rachel’s life at NYADA, he realizes that it’s not the place for him. He heads back to McKinley to “find himself,” which I think is a good move. Nobody is more welcoming of confused teenagers than Mr. Schue and the glee club.
Will is going to Washington — Mr. Schuester is ecstatic to learn that he’ll be heading to Washington to join the Blue Ribbon Panel. Emma, however, doesn’t want to tag along. She loves her job at McKinley and doesn’t want to leave it to follow Will to Washington. I think it’s totally understandable that she refuses to leave, and Will shouldn’t expect her to. After all, if she goes with him who’s going to make sure the glee club stays afloat?
Nobody wants to get Left Behind — Read more…
fair and balanced people at Fox News were attempting to do a serious interview with a newly graduated college student about (surprise) why he’s now supporting Mitt Romney instead of Barack Obama. The interview by Fox and Friends’ Gretchen Carlson, was supposed to be all about how recent grads who are struggling to find jobs are swapping their vote, but it became pretty clear that interviewee Max Rice was there to prank the show. Meanwhile, all Rice wanted to talk about was how he couldn’t believe he finally made it to prime time and was talking to Miss USA Miss America.
While most of the propagandists at Fox are probably shaking their almighty heads like they’ve been wronged, we think this guy is genius. The whole interview shows 1) How uninformed the reporting on Fox is 2) How some people will base their votes on insignificant reasons like losing a basketball game.
Watch it here:
While McKinley’s glee club holds auditions to replace all the graduated singers, Rachel deals with a bitchy instructor at NYC, played by the ever-fabulous Kate Hudson.
Here’s what you need to know from last night’s episode, “The New Rachel.”
1. Glee Club is now cool: Since New Directions won the championship last year, all the students that previously mocked them and cruelly threw red slushies in in their faces basically want to be buddy buddy because hey, glee club is now for winners. Unfortunately, now that the ND’s members are hip enough to hang with the Cheerios, they’re also developing major attitude issues. Luckily the Cheerios realize the glee club is too
losery cool for them and social order is restored.
2. Everyone wants to be the new Rachel: Now that Rachel’s left to get her ass kicked in NYC, everyone wants to take her place as the lead singer. The previously shy Tina is now a major diva and wants to be lead vocalist in glee. Unfortunately she’s got some competition in cross dresser Wade and I’m predicting a fierce diva battle. There are too many egos in this group.
3. We have two new stars: Puck’s younger half-brother is our new badboy, immediately causing trouble by lashing out at his audition. He’s going to be our new eye candy while Marley is our new sweetheart. She’s our relatable everyday girl who doesn’t have a lot of money but has a killer voice. Her mom secretly works in the cafeteria and all the students make fun of her. Marley grapples with familial insecurities, which we can all relate too.
4. Rachel’s no longer the lead cookie: Read more…
We all knew attention-whore Rachel would end up lost when she started studying at NYC’s Nyada. That’s what happens to big fish in little ponds — once they move to the ocean there’s way more competition. I was expecting the Fame-esque storyline from Glee and the promo confirms they’re going in this direction, but the new season looks 10 times better than I thought it would be because Kate freaking Hudson plays a witch of a Dance 101 instructor at the academy.
While the freshman dance in leotards around her, she confidently struts across the classroom pointing out their flaws and encouraging them to embrace body dysmorphia. It looks like she’s not a fan of her students, especially Rachel, who she insists has a stuck up attitude.
It’s true though! Rachel is pretty stuck up and if there’s one thing I want from her this season, it’s to be torn apart and built back up again as a less annoying prototype of herself.
Watch the promo for season 4 here:
I’m dreading this Fox dating show called The Choice, which features sleazy, celebrity bachelors that all agree to go on semi blind dates. The show is set up similar to The Voice in that the celebs can’t see their potential dates — they can only hear their voices. The contestants share their date pitches with the celebrities until they’re chosen.
GAG. Apparently Fox likes to recycle every successful show by applying the exact same formula to other aspects of life.
Celebrity bachelors include Jersey Shore’s Pauly D and ‘The Situation,’ as well as American Idol
star singer Taylor Hicks. First, I don’t know why anyone would want to go on a romantic date with anyone whose motto is DTF and also, why would Joe Jonas need help finding a date? Weren’t girls all over him a couple years ago?
Female celebrities include actress Carmen Electra and model Hope Dworaczyk. The trailer below insists no one plays the dating game like Fox, but The Choice and Take Me Out is a little too tacky for me. What do you guys think?
Watch it here:
By Melissa Novacaska
Tension flares in the first episode of last night’s two hour Glee, as Nationals and graduation quickly approach. Tina feels stuck in the shadows behind Rachel’s success, Puck realizes his future is at a standstill and Beiste has the courage to leave her abusive husband for good. But of course, Rachel’s attempt to gain a second audition with Mme. Tibideaux for NYADA is still in effect. Are fourteen phone messages and a muffin basket a little too persistant?
Anxious is the best word to describe the second hour, which was directly focused on the glee club’s trip to Chicago for Nationals and the return of Lindsay Lohan.(At least she performed slightly better than her latest stint on SNL.)
Without further ado, here’s what I learned from last night’s back-to-back episodes, “Props” and “Nationals.”
1) Tina’s jealousy over Rachel’s success and glory has reached its final peak. After being shut down for a solo during this year’s Nationals, Tina backlashes and shares her frustration with her fellow gleeks. Being in charge of the club’s costume design doesn’t seem to have any perks. In a “Freaky Friday” twist, the goth morphs into a retro version of Rachel and vice versa, after falling into a fountain. The rest of the gleeks have swapped bodies too, with Finn being Kurt, Puck as Blaine and Sue even switching bodies with Mr. Schuester (definitely didn’t need to see him in a red tracksuit.) In her new body, Tina err Rachel was able to shine on her own, singing Céline Dion’s Because You Loved Me (she’s got the pipes,) and she also realized how she could help the real Rachel get into NYADA. Oh and both girls got to sing a duet of What a Feeling, as Tina hoped! Read more…
By Jasmine Williams
Jess is the new Monica Lewinsky, and Cece and Schmidt are talking about the “C” word, that’s right guys, ‘commitment.’ Also, Winston’s rocking a really weird earring and the obligatory jokes are pretty much the comedic highlight of the show.
Here’s what I learned on this week’s New Girl, “Backslide.”
1) Jess is in a funk after breaking up with Russell. It’s a lot of the same sad Joni Mitchell song, lying on a carpet and roommates trying (and failing) at cheering her up. Luckily, it works just enough to get her out of her room so we don’t have to be subjected to the sight of seeing Caroline booty pop any longer.
2) Backsliding. It’s a condition that occurs post break-up, when you go crawling back to your ex and make everything messier than it was before. You want to avoid this by any means necessary. Playing keep-away with someone’s phone may be one of these means. Thank you Schmidt for improving my vocabulary, one made-up word at a time. Read more…
By Melissa Novacaska
Last night’s return of Glee proved Ryan Murphy’s unwillingness to kill any characters from the hit show so far. After a 7-week hiatus, I expected there would have been some sort of shocking revelation, either Quinn’s sudden death or the end of Finchel as we know it (even though I admit, I wouldn’t be crying tears of joy about this).
It might seem crazy, but I was overly excited to learn more about Sue’s pregnancy and discover the sex of her little monster. It was also much appreciated to get a glimpse of Blaine’s older, obnoxious, actor brother Cooper Anderson (Matt Bomer). Was it just me, or did anyone else notice the how close his name resembles that of Anderson Cooper? And did anyone else wish they’d been Sue and had Bomer take a look at their breasts before signing them? Oh well, a girl can dream can’t she?
Besides the obvious, here are five things I learned from last night’s episode “Big Brother.”
1) Broadway is apparently dead and in order to become a big name Hollywood actor, according to Mr. Anderson, one must literally point and yell whenever they read lines. He also advises the gleeks to think of a roast beef sandwich when working with a fellow cast mate to distract yourself from making eye contact with them. Somehow they buy it.
2) Blaine and Cooper really love each other and are more than just brothers, they are friends. After taking constant criticism from his older bro, Blaine lashes out at him and they recover by singing Gotye. Ummm… Blaine, do you not see how much more talented you are than your brother? Cooper mentions how jealous he is of his younger bro’s talents. I guess that’s why they call it tough love or is it in brotherly love?
By Jasmine Williams
Cece and Schmidt are officially on the house’s radar, but I can’t help but miss the secrecy surrounding their relationship and the thrill of the two of them almost getting caught. Now, hearing the two openly talk about their sexual adventures and seeing them walking around in bed sheets and towels is getting a little TMI, in my opinion.
Also, when is Nick going to get a major storyline? After his break-up with lawyer Julia, he’s been like a lost puppy and his man crush on Russell is getting creepy. Dude needs a hobby or something.
Anyways, here’s what I learned on last night’s New Girl, “Normal.”
1) Jess hasn’t gone home in a week now that she’s spending all her time with her older man Russell. Go Jess! Only she can bring a guy to his knees by seductively announcing she’s wearing his boxer briefs under her dress. But wait, doesn’t she have a job? She seems to have a lot of free time for a school teacher.
2) Jess realizes after her luxurious mini-vacay with Russell in his fancy rich world that he’s never stayed over at her rundown apartment, with her three, quirky-is-an-understatement male roommates. Maybe that’s not such a bad thing? She invites him over anyway and warns the guys to be on their best behaviour, but of course, it turns into a disaster. Read more…
I’m surprised that Cory Monteith doesn’t like dancing considering he’s regularly required to learn dance routines as Finn Hudson on Glee. Cory was on Conan O’Brien last night to promote the continuation of Glee, which comes back tonight.
He admitted that he doesn’t think he’s very good at busting a move so when he goes to clubs he does what he calls “tiny dancing,” which has nothing to do with Elton John. The dance includes a subtle Roxbury head nod and a couple shoulder shrugs. Judging from his moves in the above gif, I don’t blame him for holding back!
I hope Glee redeems itself when it returns on April 10, because I have to admit, I’ve been underwhelmed this season. I feel like Glee lost some of its original heart because everything became way too unbelievable.
Take for example, the season three winter finale “On My Way.” David Karofsky attempting suicide as a result of homophobic bullying is a relevant and emotional plot. Quinn getting into a car accident for texting and driving is genius because a lot of young people are still reckless on the road. Finn and Rachel getting married, well, that story sucks.
The point is, all these story lines are pretty good on their own, but when they collide into one episode it becomes too unbelievable. It then falls into the goliath, sensational trap that soapy teen shows like 90210 fall into. Can you actually imagine Rachel saying in her future: “Ah yes, the day Finn and I got married in high school was eventful. We had regionals just after Karofsky tried to commit suicide and my best friend went into the ER for a car accident.” Nuh uh.
While I don’t want Quinn to die, I hope they don’t use this plot as a reason for her stay back another year from her Ivy league dreams… Though the real reason would be so that we could conveniently keep her for another year after our favourite characters graduate.
That said, it looks like Glee has a lot of interesting guest stars next season, including (drumroll) Lindsay Lohan. I just hope the show doesn’t rush through some of the most topical story lines as it has in the past.
Watch it below:
By: Jasmine Williams
Is anybody else getting tired with Jess’ “I’m so socially awkward” act? It hit a new level of annoying in this episode with her whining over her rich, new boyfriend. I feel like she should walk a mile in Nick’s shoes, he’s legitimately pathetic right now.
But in other (more exciting) news, somebody (i.e. Winston) has finally found out about CeCe and Schmidt! And it involved him finding them practically mid-coitus in the back of Schmidt’s SUV and almost getting arrested by US border police. Really, would we have it any other way?
Here’s what I learned on last night’s New Girl “Fancyman Part 2.”
1) Nick has a law school friend staying over at the apartment who sexually harasses Jess and CeCe, demeans Schmidt and completes a downward dog in the span of three minutes. He also hits on undergrads. Ladies and gentleman, we have a new record for douchebaggery!
2) CeeCee is willing to be Schmidt’s sex-cretary to distract Schmidt from his work and seduce him. Seems like things are getting serious between these two if rented costumes are involved. And I now know that Schmidt has nicknamed her boobs “Harold and Kumar.” TMI.
3) Winston owns the entire Wicked soundtrack. And sings along alone in his car. To ALL of the songs. He also steals his Schmidt’s car to drive to Mexico to see his girlfriend. While I approve of his musical taste (Idina Menzel is fabulous as Elphaba), I’m not sure if the gesture is cute or creepy/stalker-like.
5) CeCe would rather sit in Schmidt’s urine than admit that they’re boinking. But she’s forced to admit it to Winston when they get caught in Schmidt’s trunk by a customs officer in a rather compromising position. Winston’s still in shock.
5) Jess’s new older beau reassures her that he wants to do her. In his buggy on the way to the picture show. Kidding. I’m just glad his daughter didn’t catch her dad and her teacher making out in a parked car like teenagers. Awkward.
By Jasmine Williams
While Jess and her new older man-friend Russell are the intended focus of this episode, I can’t help but pity Nick. He’s so broke that he weighs more than his credit score, can’t afford a phone and wears said older man-friend’s sweater to be a little more like him. The whole thing comes across as
playfully self-depreciating embarrassingly delusional.
Anyway, here are five things I learned from last night’s episode of New Girl, Fancyman, Part 1:
1) Nick has a really low credit score — like 250 low — which means he must become “the guy without a phone” as an attempt to make his poverty seem less like, well poverty, and more like a lifestyle choice. Also, apparently it’s okay for sales associates to openly mock and laugh at customers with ridiculously low scores, ie Nick. That’s cold, real cold.
2) Jess has to suck up to a student’s father (Russell) because the principal doesn’t want to lose the guy’s yearly donation. Jess is all ready to chew him out and “stick it to the man” but then he helps her out when her car stalls by — wait for it — lending her his car! So much for “fight the power,” right?
Jess plans to stick it to the man:
3) Schmidt is a trivia god. In proper Shmidty form, he’s not humble about his brilliance and will probably have to invest a serious amount of cash in the douchebag jar. He also knows how to completely ruin a make-out session with his big mouth. Yes Schmidt, you were talking too much while Winston kissed his new girlfriend.
4) Winston is still a part-time nanny (remember that?) and he’s so peeved about Schmidt’s trivia prowess, that he gets the young boy he’s looking after to tutor him. Somehow his foolproof plan of memorizing random trivia questions about key subjects like “Mesopotamia” didn’t work out and Schmidt still kicks his butt.
5) Russell is nice to Nick (the poor bartender) because he knows what it’s like to be young and broke but mostly because he’s Jess’ friend. I guess he really likes her but it’s a little suspicious that he’s compelled to give away an expensive iPhone to get a girl. Anyway, Jess and Russell have plans for a date and I can’t help but wonder whether their clashing values are going to work out.
Lady Gaga takes a vow of (media silence) and grants her last interview with Oprah, Fabolous “makes it rain” $28,000 at a strip club, and a Fox weatherman manages to offend everyone before 10 am.
By Jasmine Williams
Last night’s episode was just another example of how New Girl is slowly becoming the “Schmidt Show,” with him being the focus of not just one but two plot lines. Not that I mind, he’s clearly the most hilarious and well-developed character on the show and we even got a fat Schmidty flashback last night which is always fun (minus the vomit).
But the main plot lines are starting to drag and the subplots are becoming a little cliché and forced. Schmidt changes, and then everyone realizes he was better before? Sounds more like a Disney Channel original movie than a network TV show. And it needed more SchmeCe! Cemidt? I’ll work on it.
Anyway, here are five things I learned on last night’s episode “Control.”
1) Schmidt is growing increasingly neurotic about his secret sexy-time situation with CeCe. And who wouldn’t when a midnight rendezvous requires an encounter with the “new homeless” and soiling a pair of suede loafers?
2) Nick’s financial situation is getting dicey. After losing a poker game, a hungover Nick wakes up with curious cannon shapes on his back (note: definitely not cannons, Jess) and a $487 debt to Winston. But Nick is broke and neither is letting it go, reminding each other of all their previous debts and favours.
3) Jess probably shouldn’t have challenged Schmidt’s neat-freak ways by turning the apartment into an episode of “Storage Wars” and taking him to the beach. A hutch is broken and Tahitian vanilla is placed next to the garden variety. Needless to say it gets ugly.
4) There is a very delicate balance of control in the apartment. Schmidt learns to relax but Nick and Winston descend into chaos, getting into a fistfight in a grocery checkout line. Also, Schmidt joins a drum circle and eats street meat. The apocalypse is nigh.
5) Looks like CeCe is possibly falling for Schmidt when she sneaks into the apartment for some late-night nookie. But does she really want him, or just his itty-bitty-Schmidty? I guess we’ll have to wait and see.