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Tom Cruise’s ‘Knight and Day’ Killed at Box Office

andPOP Staff — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 17:12:39 +0000

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Tom Cruise’s illustrious comeback maybe a pipe dream as demonstrated by this week’s box office results. ”Knight and Day” was killed this weekend by “Toy Story 3″ and “Grown-ups.”

“This was the worst opening for a Cruise action movie in 20 years,” one industry insider tells PopEater. “I just don’t see how even the eerily eternally optimistic Tom can see this as anything but very bad news, maybe even the end of Tom’s long career.”

“Knight and Day,” starring Cameron Diaz and Tom Cruise took in $20.5 Million while “Toy Story” brought in $59 million haul and “Grown Ups” had $41 million.

With yet another box office blunder for the star, do you think this is the possible end for Tom Cruise?

Gamer’s Mind Blog: Infinite Ammo

Brett Caron — Fri, 18 Sep 2009 18:19:13 +0000

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Parent’s Just Don’t Understand… Yet?

Hey Ethel! I killed those Nazi zombies with my, uhh... I killed those Nazis!

Our parents are great, for the most part. When we are too small to defend or feed ourselves, they take care of us. As we grow and mature, they guide and nurture us so that we can become fully functional human beings, and not the equivalent of lower primates, sitting in trees flinging our own crap at each other (thank you Red Forman). But one area where most parents don’t quite have the ability to be the all-knowing influence they would like to be: video games.

When I was growing up playing tag and hide-and-seek, my parents totally understood. They would ask how the game went, where I was hiding, what kind of tag rules I played with – they were very involved, because they could relate my experience to their own. However, when I picked up my first Genesis game, they watched Sonic the Hedgehog like he was an alien from outer space (wait, was he?), shook their heads, and left the room. Thus ended my parent’s ability to fully understand me – from that day forward, there would always be that barrier between us – the invisible yet impassable wall made of 1-ups and gold coins.

But will it always be this way? Should I ever be unfortunate enough to have a pack of small versions of me running around underfoot, will I end up leaving them to their own devices when it comes to electronic entertainment? Or will I be able to enjoy a visit with them to our very own holodeck (wishful thinking, I know) once in a while?

Mastering DDR will never make your kids think you're cool. It may actually hurt that cause.

We know that most parents of the young (18 and under) gaming demographic right now, as well as the parents of my generation, the old guard of gaming (22-30 as of 2009) are lost when it comes to games. This is mostly because games they played when they were young were not video games. Board games and outdoor games were the pastimes of the day. If kids today suddenly picked up jacks or kick the can, their grandparents would be all over it. Any video games that these parents played were arcade games at best – a far cry from the Super Nintendo.

The difference there is that when my generation starts having kids (and some unlucky and/or stupid members already have), what kind of tech-savvy parents will we be? I’m sure that there will be the parents who just don’t get it, and that’s fine. But consider that our generation was the first real generation to have the bridge between adult’s childhood games and their children’s games blown to pieces by the advent of console gaming, leaving them to stare across the gap at their offspring playing games they could barely understand. Believe me when I tell you tag has been around forever. Your parents and their parents never reached an impasse because Grandpa couldn’t understand what was going on in hide-and-seek. So is it so revolutionary that we may be able to relate better to the next generation than our parents could with us? Or were Mom and Dad the exception to the rule?

I think it will be interesting to see whether or not the developing demographic of casual gamers rises to the challenge to understand and appreciate their kids’ new games. It might be depressing and embarrassing to be the guy who has to say to his kid “In my day, we had to play video games with controllers! On TV screens! That’s television, son! And we were thankful!” However, if you sit with the kid after your rant, and see what the new game is for the PS4000, you might just earn his respect. At least until you slip gradually into senility and start cursing at the child while making obscene gestures every time you lose (although a symptom of senility, this is also a symptom of FAIL).

Hey Timmy, are you playing the new Poke-a-man? Sure, Mom.

The last time I talked to my mom about video games was actually not that long ago. I asked her (with this article in mind) the last video game she had played besides the ill fated night she tried to play GoldenEye on the N64 with my brothers and I (good night, by the way – she spent 5 straight minutes trying to shoot out a camera with dual RCP90′s – and infinite ammo). She then told me that I should be proud to have a mother who could beat my father at Donkey Kong Jr. at the arcade when they were young lovers. I was blown away! Could this veneer of kindness, smiles and silly voices hide an inner core of gaming prowess that I simply never noticed before? Time for a follow-up question. Say Mom, you played Donkey Kong Jr., so you must remember Pac-Man, right?

“Oh yeah. He eats things, and…”

Yeah, I know. I laughed too.

If you have any hilarious stories about your parents/kids and video gaming, or the opposite event of a parent stomping you in Halo or Mario Kart, let me know below. This might even lead to a Top 5 List!

Cheers.

*disclaimer: I am fully aware that Sonic the hedgehog is an alien, since he is indigenous to the planet Mobius, and not Earth. Don’t challenge my nerddom!*

Gamer’s Mind Blog: Infinite Ammo

Brett Caron — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 23:09:35 +0000

Posted on andPOP:

I'd hate to see the result of this guy losing rock paper scissors.

You know, I have recently become enamored with the idea of the Top 5 List, as I’m sure you have gathered from the numerous past blogs in that fashion. I think that it’s interesting to see what trends and relationships different games share. However, it’s only a matter of time before these lists devolve into trite ideas like “The Top 5 Headshots in Video Games” or “The Top 5 Witty Remarks in Video Games”.

So I think I’ll take a break from my beloved yet frivolous Top 5′s, and talk a bit more directly on a more serious subject that affects people all over the world, gamers and non-gamers alike: Game Rage.

Urban Dictionary defines Game Rage as “when a person or persons playing a videogame (usually multiplayer) gets so fed up of losing that they suffer an episode of intense rage that usually lasts up to 5 minutes.” They go on to say that the rager may “simultaneously sob, scream unintelligibly at the top of their lungs, and throw random punches at anything solid, such as the floor or the person sitting next to them” and perhaps most importantly, that “despite the person’s efforts, their gameplay is inevitably not improved by this course of action.”

What Urban Dictionary doesn’t tell you is that Fallacious Anger and Ineptitude-based Limitation disorder or F.A.I.L. is a very real and dangerous affliction.

A classic example of FAIL.

Thousands, maybe even millions of gamers across the world suffer from FAIL. Many gamers suffer from FAIL for years and don’t realize it until they begin experiencing secondary symptoms, such as broken knuckles and lacerations from punching TV’s, loss of dignity, or incontinence. Although FAIL is not a communicable disease, it can result in annoyance in people experiencing prolonged exposure to someone with FAIL. This means that someone who spends a lot of time around people afflicted with FAIL should ensure they minimize the effects of annoyance – earplugs/phones to avoid auditory effects, and magazines to avoid eye contact with the unfortunate victim.

Symptoms of FAIL vary widely, depending on the variety and severity of FAIL the individual suffers from. Relatively common symptoms include shouting (typically statements of disbelief such as “Oh my God!” or “Come on guys!”), respiratory problems (often results in excessive panting, growling or sighing), and minor loss in motor control (dropping the controller, waving hands around, facial twitches). These can become more serious over time, leading to such outbursts as uncontrolled and unintelligible profanity and/or racial slurs, hyperventilation, and the spontaneous hurling of various peripherals such as controllers and headsets. These more serious symptoms are common to the more developed strain – Eclectic Pronounced Intellectually Challenged F.A.I.L. – colloquially known as E.P.I.C.F.A.I.L.

Angrybot suggests the cure to FAIL is to eat bleach and die. Angrybot cannot be trusted.

The true tragedy of FAIL is that while the victim may believe that their symptoms are actually assisting their performance in gameplay, the truth is that every symptom cumulatively hampers their ability to play, increasing their rate of FAIL. It is a vicious cycle, perpetuating itself until the person collapses under the weight of their FAIL like a dying star. These meltdowns often mimic a stroke or heart attack, and almost always result in death (of the gamer’s character).

Although FAIL has no known cure at the moment, it is treatable to an extent. With the proper support, a person can live a relatively normal life while coping with FAIL. Video games that feature glitches such as invisible walls and targeting or camera problems should be avoided, as they tend to aggravate symptoms and have the added effect of justifying a person’s FAIL to an extent. Similarly, multiplayer games should be avoided since they either aggravate FAIL or result in a misconception of gameplay enhancement in the case of letting the person with FAIL win (a truly hurtful idea, since it only perpetuates FAIL in the long term). When playing a video game with someone with FAIL, it is best to encourage them to relax, and advise that if the game is in fact flawed it can’t be helped at the moment. Suggesting other media is also encouraged, with the exception of movies or television shows with twist endings, since the realization that their theory on the outcome of the story was incorrect can aggravate FAIL.

This is either because of SCTV or FAIL.

FAIL is not always a life-long condition. Many youths suffering from FAIL sometimes suddenly stop experiencing symptoms, often on or around the age of majority. The reason for this is currently unknown, though it has been speculated that the condition may disappear as the patient grows up and stops acting like a child. Unfortunately for some, this never happens. At all.

If you or someone you know is currently suffering from FAIL, we here at andPOP are happy to assist you to get the help you need. In the interest of FAIL research, any and all donations are welcome. Please leave a comment below indicating your preferred method of payment, and a representative of the World Institute to promote Normality (W.I.N.) will contact you.

*disclaimer – The above article is a satire of meaningless PSA’s for disorders that are invented to explain moronic behaviour. If you feel that the above PSA is insensitive or mean, you may be experiencing FAIL.

Cheers!