I wouldn’t say I went into Heidi Montag’s song “Heartbeat” with an open mind as I learned my lesson from her horrible album Superficial. It’s more accurate to say I braced myself for the worst, which apparently wasn’t enough.

I considered not positing the song at all because — really — why should I make anyone listen to it? But I guess it’s a shining example of what’s wrong with the mainstream music industry today. How is she relevant enough to record an album when there are so many unrecognized talented people out there?

Even with robotic auto-tuning , Montag manages to sound whiney. It’s as though someone’s trying to bar her mouth while whispering “For all that’s good! Stop singing!” but her voice travels through the muffled hands anyway.

The lyrics aren’t much better as she promises to be: “your hot mess, school girl in curls, whatever you like” and uses pretty obvious sexual innuendos “stick your key in my ignition, baby” and “you can be my pilot when we mile-high it.”

The track is from her just released album Dreams Come True.

Listen to it here: