Brand yourself with an anal tattoo
So I know tattoos are addictive, but would you ever want you anal-area tatted up? Cause Maria Louise Del Rosario did, twice. The 22-year-old, Florida women first tattooed her anal area with her ex-boyfriend’s name “Vince.” After they broke up, she decided to get her new boyfriend’s name “Rockwood” tattooed over the first one as a birthday present for him. One thing is for sure, if I ever get a tattoo there, it wouldn’t be a guy’s name. I’d probably get: “Warning! Smelly area, stay clear.” Haha just joking.
Only in Alabama 
James Davis, 73, is fighting for his right to have his wife buried in his front lawn. The Alabama man buried his late wife there as per her request, in 2009. The city is now suing to have the body moved. I guess it doesn’t look that nice to see a tombstone on someone’s front lawn when your taking your dog for a walk around the block… However, the man isn’t giving up without a fight. He has a sign on his property that says: “Let Patsy Rest in Peace.” I honestly couldn’t think of something more “southern” and amazing. These things are what movies are made of.
We are the not the same, I am a Martian
David Oh is the flight director for Nasa’s Mars rover and decided it would be cool to live on Mars time with his family. The cool thing is the children could totally brag about staying up so late to their friends. The only bad thing is Mars time is 40 minutes longer than Earth time each day. Sleeping during the day and eating breakfast at nighttime seems cool, but in the long run, you’d be completely disoriented.
Shot in butt
A 56-year-old man accidentally shot himself in the buttocks this week with his own gun. The man went to see the movie, Bourne Legacy, when his loaded gun fell out of his pocket and hit the floor. Once it hit the floor it fired a shot straight into his behind. Just another reason why you shouldn’t carry a gun…
Seniors duke it out
Simcoe ON police were recently dispatched to an unlikely place to break up a fight: a retirement home. Police were called to the home after two men started punching each other and wrestling on the floor. The reason? One man didn’t want to hand over the microphone at a public hearing. The hearing was about whether or not they should expand the community centre. Perhaps this is a sign they should, because clearly these men need a gym or some sort of recreational facility to let out their energy. I would’ve loved to have seen this fight firsthand. In my head it looks like that one from Family Guy where the creepy pedophile neighbour meets up with a Nazi man from WWII. Someone had to have caught this on a smart phone. If you did, send this to me now. Kay, thanks.
