My headline “which cat is the bigger jerk?” is misleading, because clearly 99.9 percent of all the fluffy felines in this world are assholes. Even my cat Farley (above) is one of the most unfriendly creatures I’ve come across (but I still love him). For example, every time I try to hug him he uncomfortably squirms out of my loving embrace — biting my forearm if he feels it’s necessary — runs to a corner and starts cleaning himself like my arms were covered in mud and disease. As he cleans himself he glares at me with utter distaste and superiority.
Anyway, these two cats are similarly inclined toward a rebellious nature. Our competitors in this battle are Teddy and Loki (of course). Who do you think is the bigger jerk?
Competitor One: Teddy knocks things over just ’cause
Competitor Two: Loki likes his space
Loki reigns supreme in this battle. While Teddy puts up a fierce fight, he only knocks over one medicine bottle, whereas Loki is unstoppable.