The Queen of Pop or Madge or Esther or whatever Madonna goes by, is back in the music scene with a new song, Give Me All Your Love. Perez Hilton reports she’ll be premiering that song at next year’s Super Bowl.
No one has a recording of the complete song but Perez posted the lyrics on his site and so now, I’m gonna do what I do best: judge it for all its worth. The song begins with:
Y-O-U You wanna
First of all, there’s nothing more annoying than spelling in a song. Save that for elementary school, okay? Second of all, way to promote illiteracy, Madonna. It’s spelled L-O-V-E. Yeesh!
Give me all that you got
Maybe you’ll do fine
As long as you don’t lie to me
And pretend to be what you’re not
That’s a little contradictory, Madonna. You’ve been pretending to be something you’re not for decades. You’ve been all over America talking with a fake British accent, thinking we wouldn’t notice that you’re not at all British. Also, you’ve been lying to us all by not mentioning your brother is homeless. Just be honest, for Pete’s sake.
Don’t play the stupid game
Cause I’m a different kind of girl
Every record sounds the same
You’ve got to step into my world
Girl? Claiming to be a girl is like me claiming to be famous. It is not correct. Girl? More like old lady ready for the retirement home. And trust me, I’ve stepped into your world before, and all YOUR records sound the same. I bet this new one’s not going to be any different than Hard Candy – we all remember that flop!
Y-O-U You wanna
Keep trying don’t give up, it’s if you want it bad enough
It’s bad enough when singers name drop other famous people in their songs but it’s worse when they name drop themselves. Talk about narcissism! “Keep trying don’t give up, if you want it bad enough” – are you sure you’re singing to an audience or whining to your manfriend?
You have all the L-U-V
I gave you everything you need
Now it’s up to Y-O-U
Are you the one, shall we proceed?
M-A-D Don’t make me
L-U-V It’s time for
Y-O-U It’s up to
L-U-V I want your
B-A-D This song is bad. L-A-M-E the lyrics are lame and T-I-M-E is what I want back.