This week, The Office cameras follow the recently bachelor-ed Michael Scott and Dwight Schrute on a mission to find women in New York City, while their co-workers spend an evening trapped in their all too familiar place of employment.
The episode opens in an unfortunate manner for Michael Scott as usual as he reveals that he got gum in his hair attempting to look at “something shiny”. Dwight uses peanut butter in an effort to remove it which turns into a totally creepy peanut butter head massage. (Side note: who knew you could use peanut butter to get gum out of your hair? The Office: hilarious AND educational.)
Moving on. Everyone’s favourite corporate lackey, Ryan Howard, makes a trip out to his “favourite” Dunder Mifflin branch and calls a meeting to explain why the team has to work on a Saturday (to compensate for problems caused by his brainchild website: Dunder Mifflin Infinity). We learn that the site’s social networking section was infiltrated by sexual predators (Creed’s a fan of the website for the record), and Kelly goes off on her usual rant towards Ryan (“First of all, how dare you?!”).
Before Ryan departs, Michael asks him to set him up with some New York City girls (because as he poetically claims earlier, “it’s not the horniness, it’s the loneliness.”) Ryan declines but tells Michael he wouldn’t believe the girls he gets in the clubs in the big city (I’m thinking rohypnol plays a role). Later, Michael recruits Dwight to go clubbing with him in NYC (because when I think wingman, I definitely think THIS GUY.
Our heroes make it to the Big Apple and meet up with Ryan at a club called Prerogative. Michael observes that the club is full of “hot babies”, which Dwight sees as “a fire hazard.” Ryan welcomes them with a drunken hug and introduces the guys to his friend Troy who Dwight accurately notes bears a strong resemblance to a hobbit.
Meanwhile, back at the office, Jim has the bright idea that if the Scranton gang works a few extra hours tonight they can avoid coming in on Saturday. This idea blows up in his face however, when he forgets to tell the security guard (Hank) that they will be working late and they’re locked in. Unfortunately, Dwight has both of the spare keys and Pam reveals that when she asked him what happens if he dies, he responded, “if I’m dead, you guys have been dead for weeks.” Amazing.
Toby eventually finds Hank’s home number, but because the Dunder Mifflin employees have failed to give their security guard a single tip ever, he takes his time coming to their rescue.
Back in the big city, Ryan’s hands are shaking and he’s clearly high on more than life and beer. After Michael labels the club a “sexy preschool”, Ryan agrees to take the boys to a place where they can meet older women. With the help of a women’s college basketball team (Dwight:”amazons!”), the guys are let into the club. Dwight promptly starts making out with the leader of the amazons, Michael calls his mom (“Yes I am asking girls to dance!”), and Ryan gets beat up by a bunch of women. Definitely sounds like the makings of a successful night out. Ryan eventually gets kicked out and hobbit-man Troy flees the scene with a warning of “don’t take him to a hospital!” Super sketchy.
A few hours to the East, the Dunder Mifflin employees are still locked in. Toby makes an awkward sexual advancement towards Pam and then promptly claims he’s moving to Costa Rica, hops the fence, and peaces out of there. Eventually the cleaning crew shows up and lets the employees out, much to the chagrin of security guard Hank who arrives, takes a look at the cleaning crew, and proclaims “son of a bitch!”
In New York, the swinging bachelors return to Ryan’s apartment where he announces to them that he thinks his friend Troy has a drug problem (Dwight: “Well, I think his species has a higher tolerance than ours”). He asks for advice and Michael is only too happy to share what he has learned on The Wire even though he admits to understanding none of it. You and me both, Michael Scott, you and me both. Dwight and Ryan pass out on Ryan’s bed and Michael decides that he can’t be lonely as long as he has his boys, musing that “a famous person once said ‘boys on the side’, but I disagree, I say ‘let’s hear it for the boys.'”