Nintendo announced the official name of its next-generation console last week:

Nintendo Wii.

It?s pronounced, we. Not why or wih but we. Now, I recall really coming down hard on Nintendo in one of my first columns and I recall receiving a ton of angry reader feedback from Nintendo enthusiasts. Before I start my merciless onslaught against this atrocity of a name I?d really just like to take a minute here to make a sort of pre-emptive comment to those same Nintendo fans and anyone else who?s going to stick up for this name.

Do not bother. There is no argument that you can make for trying to justify this horrible horrible name. You are truly a Nintendo fan to stick up for them at this point, Nintendo should be thankful for your blind loyalty.

The reasoning behind the name is that it encapsulates a kind of togetherness. Also, the two Is beside the W look like controllers. All right, now, that is kind of clever – for about a second and until you say it out loud. Go ahead, say it out loud. ?Nintendo wee.? Or try plugging it in to a casual phrase in which you?d use it: ?hey come on guys, let?s go play some wee? or, ?hey fellas should I bring my wee?? Come on! This is a marketing disaster namely because it?s obvious that only a child could stomach this. What this does is put mature gamers in a tough spot having blatantly realized the fact that they might be too old for Nintendo.

One of the counterarguments that I?ve seen come up is the fact that we already see so many facets or products of our everyday life given funny names such as google, ipod and Napster. But I don?t think those are fair examples, and if you think I?m joking I have one word for you: blog. Oh how I don?t like the name blog. It represents something great: to have a personal web page in which you can express any idea or interest or whatever you like, but you also have a name that just doesn?t grow on people. I can tell you, it?s why I?ve never had one.

Another way to look at it is to think about car names. I?ll shiny and very valuable looney if you think of your five favourite cars they?ll have cool, smart or sexy names. I came up with 9/11 Turbo, 360 Spyder, RSX, 350Z and Mustang. Then think about five cars that you don?t like and would never drive. I came up with Echo, Neon, Crown Victoria, Yargus and of course, Pinto. See the difference? See how important the name of any product is? It?s absolutely crucial, especially in this case; a console claiming it will revolutionize video gaming as we know it.

In the end, I will most likely purchase this system despite the terribly bad name, but there?s no way I?m going to be casually using it in a conversation. In truth, this doesn?t matter because they could have named the system something even dumber and Nintendo would still pull in the sales. The people who Nintendo will loose however are the mature gamers who might have been considering crossing the floor or spending extra money to get a piece of the action. At the very least, the name?s absurdity has drawn plenty of attention but contrary to popular belief, there is such a thing as bad publicity.






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